Easter Jokes

the funniest easter jokes bundle, provided by Jokesful.

easter jokes

Q: What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

A: Do you want to grab a bite?

Q: Where is a rabbit’s favorite place to eat?
A: Ihop

Q: What did one egg say to the other egg?
A: Let’s get crackin!

Q: How does Easter end?
A: With an R!

Q: What is the Easter Bunny’s favorite dance?
A: The bunny hop!

Q: Why did the Easter Bunny cross the road?
A: Because the chicken had his eggs!

Q: Why is the bunny the luckiest animal?
A: Because they have four rabbits feet!

Q: What is the best way to send a letter to the Easter Bunny?
A: Hare mail!

Q: How can you tell where the Easter Bunny has been?
A: Eggs mark the spot!

Q: Why did the Easter Bunny hide?
A: Because he was a little chicken!

Q: What did the rabbit say to the carrot?
A: It’s been nice gnawing you!

Q: What did the Easter Egg say to the other Easter Egg?
A: Have you heard any good yolks today?

Q: How does the Easter Bunny keep his fur shiny?
A: With hare spray!

What did the Easter egg say to the boiling water?
It might take me a while to get hard cause I just got laid by some chick.

What’s the difference between a picture of Jesus and the real Jesus?
You only need one nail to hang up the picture of Jesus.

Why wouldn’t you want to be an Easter egg?
You only get laid once.

I love Jesus.
He’s born, I get presents. He dies, I get chocolate.

I saw Arnold Schwarzenegger eating a chocolate egg so I said to him, “I bet I know what your favorite Christian festival is.”
He said, “Have to love Easter, baby.”

I think it’s great that the supermarkets are doing ‘Buy One Get One Free’ on Easter eggs now.
It’s brilliant, because if you’re in a relationship, you can get one each for you and your partner, and if you’re a single woman, you can have both and try to eat away the loneliness.

We celebrate Jesus brutally dying on the cross by getting a giant bunny rabbit to hide chocolate eggs.
I can’t help but feel there is a massive gap in information somewhere.

A farmer plays a prank on Easter Sunday. After the egg hunt, he sneaks into the chicken coop and replaces every white egg with a brightly colored one.
Minutes later, the rooster walks in. He spots the colored eggs, then storms out and beats up the peacock.

Jesus was hanging from the cross and he called out to Peter.

“Peter, I need to see you.”
Peter tried to get to the cross but the Roman soldiers fought him back.
Jesus again said, “Peter, please come here. I want to tell you something.”
Again Peter tries to fight his way through the guards but once again they stop him.
One more time, Jesus says, “Peter, please, I need to tell you something.
This time, Peter musters up all of his strength, manages to get past the guards, goes up to the cross and says, “Yes my Lord, what do you want to tell me.”
Jesus replies, “I can see your house from up here.”

Jesus is playing a round of golf with Moses in Heaven and they come upon a water trap.

Jesus turns to Moses and asks, “Didn’t you do something with water once?” and Moses says yeah, and proceeds to do the trick where he parts the waters.
Jesus is impressed, and Moses in turn asks, “Didn’t you also do something with water?”
Jesus says, “Yeah watch this” and proceeds to step out onto the water, but he sinks almost immediately to his knees. He gets out, gets a running start, and tries again, this time sinking to his waist. He comes out confused and embarrassed and Moses asks, “What was it you were trying to do?”
“I used to be able to walk on water,” Jesus replies.
“The last time you tried it,” Moses asks, “Did you have those holes in your feet?”

Jesus walks up to a crowd of people getting ready to stone a lady to death for committing adultery and says, “Whoever is without sin may cast the first stone.”

So this little lady walks up with a big rock and smashes it down on the poor woman and splits her head wide open.
Then the little lady dusts off her hands and starts walking away. Jesus shakes his head and says, “Mom, sometimes you really get on my nerves.”

What do you get if you pour hot water down a rabbit hole?
Hot cross bunnies!

How does the Easter Bunny stay fit?
EGG-xercise and HARE-robics!

What’s the difference between a counterfeit bank note and a crazy rabbit?
One is bad money, the other is a mad bunny!

Why did the Easter egg hide?
He was a little chicken!

Knock knock
Who’s there? 
Esther who? 
Esther Bunny!

How many Easter eggs can you put in an empty basket?
Only one – after that it’s not empty any more!

Why shouldn’t you tell an Easter egg a joke?
It might crack up!

How does Easter end?
With the letter R!

What’s yellow, has long ears, and grows on trees?
The Easter Bunana!

How can you tell where the Easter Bunny has been?
Eggs (X) marks the spot!

How did the Easter Bunny rate the Easter parade?
He said it was eggs-cellent!

How do you catch the Easter Bunny?
Hide in a bush and make a noise like a carrot!

What do you call a rabbit that tells good jokes?
A funny bunny!

What’s the best way to send a letter to the Easter Bunny?
Hare mail!

Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?
Because the powder puff is on the other end!

How does the Easter Bunny travel?
By hare plane!

How does the Easter Bunny keep his fur neat?
With a hare brush!

What did the rabbit say to the carrot?
It’s been nice gnawing you!

How do you know carrots are good for your eyes?
Have you ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses?

How did the soggy Easter Bunny dry himself?
With a hare-dryer!

How does a rabbit keep his fur looking good?
With hare spray!

Why did the bunny go to the dance?
To do the bunny hop!

What kinds of books do bunnies like?
Ones with hoppy endings!

Why is a bunny the luckiest animal in the world?
Because it has four rabbit’s feet!

What did the rabbits do after their wedding?
Went on their bunnymoon!

Why was the Easter Bunny so upset?
He was having a bad hare day!

Why can’t a rabbit’s nose be 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot!

What happened when the Easter Bunny met the rabbit of his dreams?
They lived hoppily ever after!

Why did the Easter Bunny cross the road?
Because the chicken had his Easter eggs!

Why did the Easter Bunny cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t chicken!

What do you get if you cross an elephant with a rabbit?
An elephant who never forgets to eat his carrots!

What do you call a dumb bunny?
A hare brain!

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